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Hur har du det med självtilliten i svåra stunder? Är du din egen största kritiker? Vad kan få oss att ta hand om oss själva och vara rädda om oss; trots kaos, krig och orosmoln?

Att vara mån om sitt välmående i ett kravfullt och stressigt samhälle, eller ta hand om sig själv när ingen annan tycks göra det – Det är Självmedkänsla. Precis som självförtroende och självkänsla är det en viktig ingrediens till din identitets-anrättning samt en vattendelare i de val, beslut och utmaningar du står inför.

Den här informationen, råden och tipsen är en sammanställning med utgångspunkt i en digital självhjälpskurs inom ramen för föreläsningar med Recovery College.

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Vad du gör – Din kompetens, det du lyckas med. Hur du själv uppfattar att du lyckas. En tro på att du kan och känner att du klarar de uppgifter du har. När du lyckas med något växer ditt självförtroende.

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Vad du känner – hur du tänker och tycker kring dig själv och hur trygg du är med dig själv. Beskriver vilket värde Du tycker att du har, om du är nöjd med dig själv. Självkänslan påverkar ditt psykiska mående.

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Något du ger till dig själv – i med- och motgång, när du har det tufft eller mår dåligt över något. Den omsorg du visar till dig själv när det går bra och särskilt när det går emot.

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hur fungerar självmedkänsla?

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Förmågan att ta hand om sig själv även när man misslyckas eller inte mår så bra

(forskning visar att självmedkänsla påverkar vår psykiska hälsa och förmåga att göra förändringar)

” _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” price_title_font=”ABeeZee||||||||” price_title_text_align=”center” price_title_text_color=”#6B6B6B” price_title_font_size=”15px” custom_margin=”||30px||false|false” custom_padding=”|30px||30px|false|true” global_colors_info=”{}”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”iconlist” iconlist_font_icon=”||fa||900″ iconlist_icon_size=”22px” iconlist_icon_color=”#28aa1d” iconlist_title=”Omtanke om sig själv” title_padding=”|||20px|false|false” item_bg_bgcolor=”rgba(0,0,0,0.06)” _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” price_title_font=”Nunito||||||||” price_title_text_color=”#474747″ price_title_font_size=”17px” custom_padding=”15px||15px||true|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”iconlist” iconlist_font_icon=”||fa||900″ iconlist_icon_size=”22px” iconlist_icon_color=”#1dad29″ title_padding=”|||20px|false|false” _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” price_title_font=”Nunito||||||||” price_title_text_color=”#474747″ price_title_font_size=”17px” custom_padding=”15px||15px||true|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”iconlist” iconlist_font_icon=”||fa||900″ iconlist_icon_size=”22px” iconlist_icon_color=”#1dad29″ iconlist_title=”Bemöta sig själv med vänlighet och respekt” title_padding=”|||20px|false|false” item_bg_bgcolor=”rgba(0,0,0,0.06)” _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” price_title_font=”Nunito||||||||” price_title_text_color=”#474747″ price_title_font_size=”17px” custom_padding=”15px||15px||true|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”iconlist” iconlist_font_icon=”||fa||900″ iconlist_icon_size=”22px” iconlist_icon_color=”#1dad29″ title_padding=”|||20px|false|false” _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” price_title_font=”Nunito||||||||” price_title_text_color=”#474747″ price_title_font_size=”17px” custom_padding=”15px||15px||true|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”button” button_url=”#” button_url_new_window=”1″ _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” custom_button=”on” button_text_size=”18px” button_text_color=”#FFFFFF” button_bg_use_color_gradient=”on” button_bg_color_gradient_direction=”90deg” button_bg_color_gradient_stops=”#902ce4 0%|#4e04da 100%” button_border_width=”0px” button_border_color=”RGBA(255,255,255,0)” button_border_radius=”100px” button_font=”Nunito|700||on|||||” button_alignment=”center” button_custom_margin=”10px||||false|false” button_custom_padding=”6px|40px|6px|40px|true|true” box_shadow_style_button=”preset1″ box_shadow_vertical_button=”0px” box_shadow_blur_button=”10px” box_shadow_spread_button=”5px” box_shadow_color_button=”rgba(0,0,0,0.2)” global_colors_info=”{}” transform_styles__hover_enabled=”on|hover” transform_scale__hover_enabled=”on|hover” transform_translate__hover_enabled=”on|desktop” transform_rotate__hover_enabled=”on|desktop” transform_skew__hover_enabled=”on|desktop” transform_origin__hover_enabled=”on|desktop” transform_scale__hover=”110%|110%”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][/digr_advanced_price_list][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.21.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][digr_advanced_price_list adpl_item_alignment=”digr_adpl_item_center” _builder_version=”4.21.0″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin=”||-86px|||” custom_padding=”||13px||false|false” border_radii=”on|30px|30px|30px|30px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″ box_shadow_vertical=”0px” box_shadow_blur=”10px” box_shadow_spread=”5px” box_shadow_color=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)” global_colors_info=”{}”][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”title” adpl_item_alignment=”digr_adpl_item_center” price_title=”varför är det så svårt?” item_bg_background_image=”https://loycheslyrik.se/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/title-bg-3.png” _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” price_title_font=”Abel|700||on|on|||#FFFFFF|dotted” price_title_text_color=”#FFFFFF” price_title_font_size=”58px” custom_padding=”60px||150px||false|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”price” _builder_version=”4.27.0″ _module_preset=”default” price_font_font=”Jost|700|||||||” price_font_text_color=”#030c3f” price_font_font_size=”68px” currency_font_font=”Jost|700|||||||” currency_font_text_color=”#030742″ currency_font_font_size=”58px” custom_padding=”30px||30px||true|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][/digr_advanced_price_list_item][digr_advanced_price_list_item select_pricelist_content=”description” adpl_desc=”

Skuld och skam

(båda behövs, har varit viktiga för att vi ska överleva och kunna leva tillsammans – men överdriven skam och skuld ökar risken för nedstämdhet och ångest)

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Vissa av våra reaktioner kan liknas vid urgamla överlevnadsstrategier

Du har säkert hört talas om begreppet fight-flight.

När man står inför en svår situation kommer man antingen fly eller fäkta, alltså vilja springa iväg eller sjunka genom jorden, alternativt slå ifrån sig och streta emot.

För våra förfäder kunde det vara en fråga om liv eller död.

Det finns även ett tredje begrepp, freeze. Det innebär att man fryser, eller låser; alltså stelnar till i situationer som kan framstå som hot.

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Hur vi fungerar

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Överlevnadshjärnan agerar innan vi hinner tänka

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när vi får påslag av stress, oro och ångest

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ältar man det som varit eller oroar sig för framtiden och förlorar kontakten med nuet

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men med hårt arbete, tålamod och övning kan man bana my mark

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Ingen föds självkritisk

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Hur har vi fått lära oss om oss själva?
Hur har andras åsikter om oss avspeglats?

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föräldrar, samhället, lärare, medier…

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trygga demokratiska länder eller fattiga slumområden?
i en stimulerande eller dränerande miljö?

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Människor som är måna om dig eller dömer dig?

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Är de förebilder pga. deras värderingar eller utseende?

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Har vi fått med oss sunda förhållningssätt där vi hamnar i livet?

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Attraktionslagen – hur du återspeglar

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Självkorrektion med självkritik

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• Fördömande/bestraffande
• Ser tillbaka
• Ilska, frustration, besvikelse
• Fokus på fel/misslyckanden
• Fokus på specifika egenskaper
• Undvikande/isolering
• Känsla av ensamhet

= Ökad risk att misslyckas

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Självkorrektion med självmedkänsla

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• En önska att förbättra
• Ser framåt
• Stödjande/vänlighet
• Fokus på vad som gått bra/framsteg
• Helhetssyn på sig själv
• Hopp/ökat engagemang
• Känsla av samhörighet

= Ökad chans att lyckas

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Det kanske värsta med oro, rädslor och ångest

…är just oron, rädslan eller ångesten att utsätta sig för potentiellt skamfulla situationer. Problemet med det är att just detta föder ångesten.

Ju mer man undviker sina demoner, desto mer framträder dom.

Vårt levnadssätt har förskjutit varningssignaler vid direkt fara (t.ex. vilda djur) till att ge mer sublima påslag desto oftare (t.ex. mobilaviseringar och påverkan från sociala medier).

Har man anlag för påverkan blir man lätt överkänslig i vårt moderna samhälle, med alla intryck, sinnesstimuli och sociala förväntningar.

Det här kan i långa loppet leda till försämrad självkänsla, utbrändhet och att man drar sig undan.

Det perfektionistiska samhället matar dig också med budskap som bara ökar din självkritik. Det finns mycket att jämföra sig med, få egentliga förebilder.

Med Självmedkänsla lär du dig att kunna se misslyckanden som nyttiga erfarenheter, att ha en optimistisk utgångspunkt samt lyfta det som är positivt – även hos dig själv.

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Viktiga aspekter

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Sammanhang – plats/miljö (med andra)

Samhörighet – hur man känner att man är kopplad till andra

Skyddsfaktorer

Trygghet med andra – de man litar på och kan prata med

Tillåta sig vara med och ta plats

Acceptans – att acceptera är att finna sig i att det är som det är, inte att man tycker att det borde vara på ett visst sätt

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Riskfaktorer

Ensamhet och isolering

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Komponenter i kugghjulet

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Att vara varm och förstående mot sig själv när man lider, misslyckas eller känner sig otillräcklig; snarare än att ignorera
smärtan eller slå ner på sig själv med självkritik. Vad behöver du just nu för att känna lugn, tröst, vila, mod, etc.?

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Alla människor lider. Definitionen av att vara människa är att vi alla är dödliga, sårbara och inperfekta. Att inse att lidande och att känna otillräcklighet är en del av att vara människa och är något vi alla går igenom snarare än att det är något som bara drabbar dig.
”Precis som alla andra lider, NU händer det mig”. Såklart ska du ha respekt för ditt lidande, men tar du bort självkritik och isolering är det lättare att känna självmedkänsla.

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Att närma sig negativa känslor utan att trycka undan eller förstora dem. Ett icke dömande, mottagligt sinnestillstånd där du observerar tankar och känslor som de är, utan att trycka ner eller förneka dem. Vi kan inte ignorera jobbiga känslor och visa medkänsla samtidigt.
• En metod som kan användas för att hantera bland annat stress, oro och smärta.
• Den är personlig vad som passar just dig och det gäller att testa sig fram.
• Öva, öva och öva lite till och ha tålamod med dig själv.

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En medkännande person

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Mindre självkritisk, mindre rädd att göra fel

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Mer nyfiken och samarbetsinriktad

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Känner till livets svårigheter och förutsättningar

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Stark och modig, varm och vänlig

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Icke dömande, har en känsla för ansvar och önskan att hjälpa med
förändring

Uppmärksamhet är tankens muskel.
Medkänsla är hjärtats muskel.

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Vinster med Självmedkänsla

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Ökade skyddsfaktorer

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Ökat välbefinnande

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Större acceptans

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Förståelse

För dig själv och din situation.

Varför är jag som jag är?
Vad är det som känns så jobbigt?
Varför känns det jobbigt?
Vad har jag med mig i min ryggsäck som gör det?

Acceptans

Se på situationen utan dömande eller självkritik.

Vänlighet

”Självsnäll” – ömhet och mjukhet mot dig själv.

Inte slå ner på dig själv då du redan har det jobbigt.

Värme

Känslomässig värme och trygghet, men också att känna
fysisk värme som att stå i solen, ta en varm dusch/ett varmt bad

Omsorg

Trösta och stötta dig själv.
Vad kan du göra för att få en paus?
Hur visar du omsorg till någon du tycker om? Gör detsamma mot dig själv.

(Compassion-modellen)

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.27.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.27.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.27.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.27.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.27.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]

”När du kikar ut genom fönstret och säger att solen inte lyser så är det inte sant.
Solen lyser alltid.
Fast ibland är det moln i vägen som gör att du inte ser solen.
Samma sak med dig.
Ibland är det oro, tvivel och annat som gör att du inte ser det som innerst inne är du.
Men precis som för solen så kommer molnen försvinna.
Glöm aldrig det.
Du är inte molnen. Du är solen.

– popretorik.se

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_image src=”https://loycheslyrik.se/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/entrance-24-2x.png” title_text=”entrance-24-2x” url=”https://loycheslyrik.se/artiklar/” align=”right” _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]

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Självmedkänsla